Adap[s]tation

Def:

Any alteration in the structure or function of an organism or any of its parts that results from natural selection and by which the organism becomes better fitted to survive and multiply in its environment.

Another year is over (No S* Sherlock?) and all I can show for it is not what I thought I would show for it this time last year. I have tried to adapt to a lot of different situations that seem to arise with an uncanny frequency, much to my chagrin (and grins too). I still jaywalk around with an amused look on my face because, like I always say, humans are a comic relief all by themselves just by being .. well .. beings.

I have much to adapt to this coming year - (including but not limited to):

- Proscribe people that do not necessarily fit in with the metamorphosis

- Accept: - that he is gone for good - but not in my heart, mind, memories, emotions, love, prayers. We had just been lent him for a short while to teach us - me - that not everything is forever.

Some say it wasn't worth the things we went through
I say it wasn't worth losing you
I hope you know how much you changed my life
Some day you will see
If only through heaven's eyes

You taught me how it really feels to lose someone, how it hurts, how there is no reset button, no do-over, no sorry, no excuse me, no second chance, no 'my bad' - that gone is gone. I am really sorry and I will love you till we meet again - and then we will have our forever.

On a lighter note, Cutinator turned two, and decided that "I will be right back" is his way of telling you that he needs 'his space' - damnation, he is only two! Oh, and he says 'Thank You' when you hand him something. Tihi. I appreciate him a lot more now than before, after the fact.

My relationship with a lot of people has gone to the dogs, but my relationship with God has taken precedent over everything else. I am learning humility and gratitude in a new level - clear eyed and minded. I am also learning to say 'F* You' - tihi - Who said that I couldn't swear? Eh? Not as cute as I seem! :D.

I am loved by a very special cadre of people, and for that I am really grateful - and I love you back. Your motives may not necessarily be kosher (lol), and we may bang heads more than we bang lips, but hey, I never commissioned for the perfection matching band, or non-matching band, or jaywalking band, or any other motion and/or motionless band whatsoever. I do me, and sometimes let [you] - (singular), do me - but ain't no fakery out here in G's Land.

And, I am entering 2010 in the best physical and emotional and spiritual shape I have been in ever. I have never felt healthier, fitter, sexier (ok, a female colleague hitting on me relentlessly kinda makes me wanna erase that last one), happier, content, focused, ready for whatever. Although, having said that, there is something that I am embarking on in a week or so that may or may not need me to invest in an ejection seat - anyone know of any Typhoon I can borrow for a while? - might be needed cos damn, someone is digging, and trust me, the hole will be oh soooo deep they ain't gonna be exhumable any time soon (parachute to jump in (instead of out-of) said hole notwithstanding!) Damn.


Needless to say, A blessed New Year to everyone - big and small (wasn't that one person once?)

Love from the Antarctica - see you on the other side!