Verisimilitude

They say that God has a wicked sense of humour, and I am Testament to said. (“The Gospel according to G" has a nice ring to it, No?)

Picture this: It is not bad enough that I am confused to the nth term, but He deems it necessary to put a spanner (or two, or three) in the works by poking me (literally and figuratively) in so many places I feel like a walking pin cushion.

We are talking about buses – you know, them boxy things that you are supposed to be waiting for, and that, after waiting for one for so long, three come along at once? Yeah, them!

Case in point:

Bus Number One: Came at an inopportune moment – had been waiting for one and since I had been standing outside exposed to the elements, I decided to take it, not knowing that it wasn’t exactly headed in the same destination as I was, but willingly taking it nonetheless. A couple of stops later, the deviation came and I had to gracefully hop off. We might have to reconnect sometime later along the way but for now I am exposed to the elements again.

Hence, Bus Number Two: Right at the time when I disembarked number one, two was kinda hovering in the peripherals, but it did not look like it was picking up passengers (or I was rather not looking to be hopping on it, yet), so it kinda hang around revving its engines which while ignoring the noise, I was perpetually amused to find that it considered the racket annoying enough for me to either say f* it and hop on or just keep walking.

Funnily enough, it was one of those buses that coast alongside with the premise that it is not going to be waiting forever, but at the same time giving you infinite moments to change your mind and get on. I decided to concede defeat not so much as get on but walk alongside it for a while until the route number that I desired came along, or (I stupidly surmised) I might get to my destination without necessarily committing (or is it commuting?) to, or paying for, the ride, but having the company to my destination. What a load of .. .er.. passengers!

It is on my ‘not really in the bus, but not necessarily in the ‘hail and ride’ sidewalk either’ routine that Bus Number Three slowed up alongside. It had all the markings of the right route number for my destination, or at least heading that way, but from my view of it, had no available seating. While not giving it a wide berth, I decided to ‘sniff a little, without marking my territory’ to find out whether any passengers might be dislodging halfway through the journey, thence giving me a seat on this, to my perspicacity, a highly desirable option. I did get close enough to get seared by the engine, and I may be running the risk of having my toes run over (or put another way, the reverse is true :D), but in my four year old voice: I am so excited

Not to add more poking into this keg of works (mixed metaphors notwithstanding), another bus that I had considered much earlier but might chalk down to a sort of fugue state (that is my story and I am sticking to it), somehow found its way (without, of course, any directional mikes from yours truly whatsoever – What?) to where I was mixing my metaphors, and rides, and routes, and buses – with what they call in some circles ‘an offer you cannot refuse’!. It might be safe to add at this juncture that that ‘offer’ has been tabled before, with a look that most people who have been offered the same gig might or might not feel the need to cart one ‘offee’ to a place where a ‘safe, sterile, padded room, straight jacket an option’ might be de rigueur, but hey, ‘fugue’ is the word of the moment – learn it – especially its Latin persuasion.

TGIF

I get a two day grace period – a visit to ‘A Church’ is required – ‘Gospel according to Sod’ will have to find another sodding puppet to string in its wake (I do crack myself up endlessly)!

AOB:

AAE: 'Anal About English' jaunts: What would you call a person who murders another person for murdering language?
Whatever it is, I am it!

Phrase of the day: .... The Precedessors that came before me! - as opposed to??

Lookup (Literally): Decimal.Incentive.Latin